This blog is a bit late because I wanted to do the assigned exercise before posting. The exercise was to unplug and be totally silent with no TV, radio, music, phone, internet, conversations, books, computers, etc. – nothing but me and my thoughts. Ideally, I would get out of town for two to four days. Right now, I struggled to get in 10 hours and it took 10 days to get it done. The old blueprint came up with resistance from those around me. The first three attempts were cancelled due to the weather and I could not get time alone. I know I have a lot of power and I create the life that I want with my thoughts but, I’m not so sure I have a direct and immediate control of winter storms. I still respect the oceans. On my next iteration of this quiet exercise, I will go listen to the oceans.
Ten hours isn’t that long and so I didn’t travel. I stayed around the house with everything shut down. I sat still, only ate raw fruits and vegetables, drank only water, took a walk, jotted some notes, did some gentle exercise, and took a nap. I didn’t miss the internet, haven’t watched TV for years, and was happy to put down my cell phone and not use the computer. I just let go. I focused on the question of what my unique gift is and what I would do with it. I just went deeper within myself.
And then… nothing happened. The world didn’t end. So, I don’t have to control it any more.
Internally, the day created a shift for me even though it was a short time. Most of the shift came later that day and the next day. I look forward to a longer quiet time so I experience the shift while still quiet and I can really hear it land on me.
I find that I am very comfortable with being alone. Of course, I always have and I could easily be a recluse. That’s a two edged sword. While I enjoy my alone time, it’s been holding me back and I need to re-engage with society to manifest my DMP. I was able to focus on my DMP and the one thing that I will do to generate the cash needed to do so. I was also able to move my mind in the direction of the changes that I personally need to make so that I can be the person I need to be in order for my DMP to become my reality.
There are three words that came up in the day that had a major impact for me: Adrenaline, Renouncement, and Detachment.
I realized just how addicted I am to adrenaline and that’s what the emails, text messages, social media, TV, radio, and drama that we create feeds. Taking a break from the adrenaline rush released a lot of stress that I was carrying. I will use my electronic connections to the world but, not for an adrenaline fix. I’m not revving it up anymore!
Renouncement is a big step and this day gave me a start on this step. I am closer to renouncing the world and living for something other than myself. It’s through this renouncement that it will be possible to see the invisible. It isn’t about me getting stuff but rather about me being the example and get closer to God, the Universal, the Spirit inside us all. I can let go of the stuff and get to a minimal state in my space. I can also be friends with my food. I let go of success.
I think detachment is going to take a while. I understand that I am alone. I accept that every step I take to improve, every idea that I present, every change I initiate would typically be met with rejection, resistance, derision, negativity, criticism, and denial of my will. That hurts and would stop me in my tracks. I realize that it’s not personal and it’s not about me. I have changed my blueprint, my heart and intentions are clear and full of love. I am happy with the journey I am on and I follow the road of love, persistence, and appreciation. The remarks and responses from others may be a blessing in disguise. I can separate from them and use my own spirit as a reference.
So, what’s the answer to the question that I have been listening for: What’s my unique gift?
I share my true self with others every day. I look and listen for how and where I can help them make a start or take the next step on their journey. I seek authentic connections and then expand them.